


disillusion | JayKyu

by Driwed



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Petals, Possibly Unrequited Love, Supernatural - Freeform, jaykyu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2018-09-02
Packaged: 2019-06-29 11:29:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 8,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15728505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Driwed/pseuds/Driwed
Summary: It's said that unrequited love causes people to cough flower petals, and Changmin doesn't believe that until he starts coughing daisies because his boyfriend, Jacob, seems to be falling out of love with him.(this wasn't my idea. credit goes to the original. i'm just writing it. original characters have been changed.)





	1. Brief Words

**Hi there! It's your favorite author, hopefully, coming out with another The Boyz fanfic because of lack thereof.**

**Remember, despite what i write in this ff, please love and support The Boyz! Just like your other stans, they deserve everything and more.**    
**EVERYTHING IS PURE FICTION.**

**So, read it and let me know how you feel about it!**

**if this isn't your cup of tea, i have other stories that might be!**   
** My Bully ** **(completed)**   
** Sin ** **(completed)**   
** To J.B ** **(completed)**   
** To Each His Own ** **(completed)**   
** Forget Me Not ** **(completed)**   
** Dawn of Love ** **(completed)**   
** Seaside ** **(completed)**   
** Breathless ** **(completed)**   
** Heated Desire ** **(completed)**   
** MedicalHockeyAu ** **(completed)**   
** detraction ** **(completed)**   
** Drizzle ** **(completed)**   
** guidance ** **(completed)**   
** Dashing ** **(completed)**   
** Fancafe ** **(temporarily completed)**   
** Artist ** **(completed)**   
** Florescent Nostalgia ** **(completed)**   
** Skirt & Sister Chan ** **(oneshots)**   
** Different ** **(completed)**   
** little ** **(completed)**   
** He's Bad He's Worse **   
** Extricate **


	2. 12 - 1

I quietly went about my business, typing away at the computer. Being a personal assistant has its perks, but is a very fluctuating job. One day your drowning in work and the next it's like you have a day off. Today happens to be in the middle of the two extremes. "Mr. Ji!" I turned to see Ms. Kori walk over to me holding a cup of coffee. "Here, I got it from that place. I don't see why you like it there." She gave me a smile before heading back into her office. She's my boss. Everything about her is pretty much great, except that no matter how many times I tell her, she continues to touch me without consent. Not that I'd ever give her consent.

I've been considering another job for the longest, but I wouldn't make as much as I am now. Is it worth the risk in staying? Not likely. I heard a cough come from her office and assumed it was the usual. It was always around this time she would cough and flower petals would come out. I don't know who she loves, but it's obvious he or she doesn't share the same feelings. "Hey." I look up and see Eric hovering by my desk. "How goes it?" "Could be better. So, are you really leaving...?" "Yeah. At this point, I'd have to call her out for the sexual harassment and it'll definitely cost me my job." Eric patted my back then left a cup of tea and a bagel. "At least someone around here knows what I like." I handed him the cup of coffee and watched him leave.

The long day ended and I found myself waiting in the lobby for Eric. I noticed someone had sat down near me in my peripheral vision. "Hey, Changmin." "Hey. You don't usually talk to me, or anyone at that." "Yeah. I heard you're leaving." "Has word really gotten around?" He shook his head then pointed to Eric who was coming down the stairs. "He told me then made me promise to keep quiet." "That sounds like him." For as long as I've known Eric, not once has he coughed out flower petals. He wouldn't tell me who, but I've come to believe it was Sangyeon as he expressed himself more around him. Maybe I'm wrong.

"Sorry! Ms. Kori kept me back a bit. Ready?" "Yeah." Eric looked at Sangyeon briefly then looked away. I couldn't understand why they avoided conversation as they used to talk normally a few days ago. "What's going on between you two? One moment you're buddies and now you're strangers." "Nothing is-" "We kissed." I looked at Sangyeon in surprise as I didn't expect that kind of answer from him. "I guess my hunch was wrong." Sangyeon stood up and only got so far before Eric stopped him. "Did you really mean it?" "Yes. I don't-" Eric had silenced him with a hug and I couldn't help but find it wholesome.

I split ways from Eric as he lived uptown. "Get home safe. And don't come in tomorrow looking like a mess." "Shut up..." I couldn't help but laugh at his pouty face. My phone rang and I happily answered the call. "Hey, I'm just now getting in the car-" "I can't go today." My heart sunk, but I tried to sound as fine as possible. "It's okay, don't worry about it. You don't need me to pick you up?" "No." He hung up and I let out a sigh. This wasn't the first time he's canceled and I'm sure it won't be the last. I wanted to know what has him so busy, but it was obvious that he'd avoid the question.


	3. 11 - 1

**~Time skip: 1 week~**

I wiped down the table then reorganized the objects. "Hey, could you move a little faster?" I groaned as Hyunjae always felt the need to boss me around as he's only worked here longer than I have. "I still can't believe that famous CEO woman got labeled as a sex offender. Whoever it was has serious balls." I quietly thanked him for the compliment then moved on to the next and last table. The door opened and another employee with the afternoon shift walked in. "Hey, Chang." "Hey." I couldn't help but wonder how Eric was doing back at the company. Is he dating Sangyeon now? He hasn't talked to me ever since I left, not that I made much effort. How could I since I was busy changing my life around? The least he could've done was check up on me.

"Hey! Earth to Changmin!" "Huh?" "You have company." I turned to where he was pointing and saw Jacob standing by the door looking at me. "Oh." I handed the rag to Juyeon then made my way over to Jacob. "Sorry to disturb you during work." "It's okay. What's up?" "Are you busy after work? I want to take you out somewhere." "I'm available. Should I meet you or...?" "I'll come here and get you." I couldn't help but smile as it had been awhile since he initiated a date. "I'll stay for a bit, if you don't mind." "Not at all." He takes a seat at one of the tables then starts to scroll on his phone. Someone pulled me over to the side and whispered in my ear. "Who is that cutie?"

"Well, that cutie is  **my**  boyfriend." Hyunjae sucked his teeth then sighed. "The good ones are always taken." Juyeon walked past us as I assumed he went to go post Jacob's order. "Hey, Juyeon. You dating anyone?" "Yep. Wonderful girl. I swear, she's so tiny and cute. I really just want to put her in my pocket." "Can we meet her one day?" "If she's available." "I'm really the only single guy here." I couldn't help but laugh at his childish side appearing. More people started coming in, which gave me little time to talk to Jacob. As I served an order, I noticed Jacob had just left out the door.  _"He didn't even say goodbye..."_  I sighed then felt something tickling my throat. I drank some water then noticed the tickling had disappeared. The rest of the day carried on with me serving, taking orders and cleaning tables.

I quietly sat at one of the tables as I waited for Jacob to come by. "See you tomorrow, Chang." "Later." They had left and I was left in a rather quiet shop. I looked at the time on my phone and wondered if he was running late. "Hey, you're still here?" I looked up and saw one of the night shift workers sit down opposite of me. "Yep." "Maybe you should go home." "Did Hyunjae tell you, Shiro?" "You know he's a blabbermouth." I lightly banged my head against the table then looked at him. "Maybe I will, but I'll wait a bit more." He sighed, stood up then walked away. I really wanted to go home, but I had hope that he was just running late. 20 minutes had passed and still no Jacob.  _"I guess he forgot..."_  I sighed then headed towards the door. "Have a good night." "Thank you, Eunyong."

I looked at my phone once more to see if I got a text or a missed call. I saw neither. I felt something tickling my throat then proceeded to cough.  _"P-Petals...?"_  I stared at the daises on the ground, unable to move forward.  _"It can't be...We love each other..."_  I hurried home as I didn't want to be seen crying in public.


	4. 10 - 1

I woke up feeling groggier than usual. I looked around me and saw quite a few petals on my bed. "So it can happen in your sleep too..." I was reluctant to get out of bed, but I couldn't skip work because of this. My phone started ringing and was surprised to see Juyeon calling me. "Guess what?" "Jaemi got you a gift?" "Not this time. Apparently the morning shift workers were assigned to work our shifts as well, so we're off today." Somehow the universe had worked in my favor. "Thanks for the info. Later." I lied back down and repeatedly thanked the universe. "Should I go see Jacob today...? But yesterday..." I shook last night's events from my mind and decided to go see him after all.

I entered the building and was let through as they know my face by heart. "Oh, he's been assigned another room. Here." She handed me a piece of paper with a number on it. "Thank you." I made my way to the second floor then looked for the new room number. I knocked on the door and waited for him to open it. The door was opened by a woman and not Jacob. "Yes?" "Uh, is this your room?" "No. You here for Jacob?" "Yes." She looked me up and down before taking her leave.

I entered the room and saw Jacob sipping on an iced coffee while fixing his hair. "Hey." "You aren't working today?" "No..." "I see. Do you want anything?" "Well, some water would be nice." He tossed me a water bottle then busied himself on his phone. "That woman, is she a coworker?" "Yeah." "I see..." Silence fell over us and I wanted to disappear so badly. We always had things to talk about, but lately he's been like this. "When do you go live...?" "10 minutes. I should get going. You can stay in here if you want. You know where everything is. It'll be an hour until I'm done." He walked out and I found myself feeling lonelier than ever.

I perked my head up at the sound of the door opening. "You really waited here?" "Yes. I wanted to see you. I miss you..." I felt myself starting to tear up, but I successfully kept them in. "Well..." He gave me a hug from behind which sent my heart into a frenzy. "I have time now." I wanted to ask about last night, but I was afraid to ruin the mood. "Jacob?" "Hm?" "Why did you stand me up last night?" I heard his breath hitch then he sighed. "I apologize. They called me suddenly asking if I could replace someone and I couldn't really turn down an extra pay." "I see..." I wanted to yell at him and tell him that he hasn't been being a boyfriend, but I didn't want to make things worse. "I can make it up to you now." "How?" He released me then left the room.

He came back in with a sugary snack and my favorite tea. "I planned a sweets date last night, but then that happened..." He handed them to me and I reluctantly accepted them. "I'm sorry Chang..." "It's okay, don't worry about it." It disgusted me how often I've said that line. I always think of what I really want to say, but I always end up saying something else. I hate acting like this, like a doormat. Someone knocked on the door then came in without our consent. "Jacob-Oh, who's this?" "My boyfriend. Did you need me?" "Well, if you're busy, I'll trouble someone else." I hoped that he would pick me over his work. I really did. "It's fine, I'm sure Chang wouldn't mind." I gave him a forced smile then sent him on his way. I wish I held him back.


	5. 9 - 1

I wiped my eyes then stared at the daisies. "What am I doing wrong...Is it even my fault?" Nothing seemed wrong and there weren't any signs. "Am I just boring...?" I left the sugary snack and tea as I left the building.

I opened the door to my apartment then locked it behind me. I wanted to cry, to yell. I wanted things between us to be normal again. I wanted Jacob back. I lied down in bed and I suddenly felt tired and heavy. "What can I do to win his love back...?" I started listing things off, then fell asleep.

I woke up and saw it was dark out.  _"1:53am..."_  I stared up at the ceiling wondering if Jacob was asleep by now. I jumped at the sound of my phone ringing then answered it. "Hello?" "Chang..." "Juyeon...?" "Who's Juyeon?" I mentally face palmed as I realized I had read the contact name wrong. "He's a coworker. You're calling awfully late..." "Well sorry for bothering you." "Don't hang up. Don't. What did you want to say to me?" "I'm outside your building. Can you let me in?" I got up and walked over to the monitor. I buzzed him in then waited by the door. I was just as confused as I was concerned as to why he was here so late. I noticed we were still on the call and decided to end it. There was a knock and I looked to see who.

I opened the door and my nose was hit with the strong scent of alcohol.  _"That's why he's here..."_  I locked the door behind him then followed him to the living room. "Whenever you're drunk, you always come here...Why?" "I feel safe here." I sighed as I watched him sway a little. "Don't lie down." He did as he was told then I went to the kitchen to get him a glass of water. I handed it to him then saw that my help was needed. "I'm going to sleep." He grabbed me by my waist then pulled me down onto his lap. "Stay." "No. You stink." "That wounds me." "As if you haven't wounded me too." He put his face into the nape of my neck and it worried me that he would attack my weakness. "Let me go." "No." I struggled in his hold, but he had surprising strength when he was intoxicated.

"Jacob, I said stop!" My pleas went unheard as he continued to stimulate my cock. I bit his arm hard then rushed to my room as soon as he had released me. I locked my door then fixed myself up. No thanks to him, my cock was begging for more attention and the needy feeling became more apparent. "Changmin..." "No. Go lie down and sleep." "I don't want to sleep alone." "We do it everyday." "Please..." "No." He had gone away and I let out a sigh of relief. I looked down at my bulge and started to palm myself slowly. It had been awhile since my cock received any stimulation, so I decided to finish what Jacob had started.

I turned on the shower head then sighed. Sex would've been great if he wasn't drunk and our relationship wasn't starting to crumble. I coughed up more daisies then proceeded to get in. I felt arms wrap around me before I could get in and pull me back. "Let's shower together." "Stop. You're drunk." "Not like before..." I sighed then stepped in with Jacob. "I could hear you, you know." I looked away from him and proceeded to wash myself. "I apologize about earlier...I was out of line." "Very." He hugged me from behind again. I always loved his back hugs, but for once, I didn't want it. "Just hurry up and wash yourself." "Okay..."


	6. 8 - 1

I opened my eyes then sat up in bed.  _"Right...he wanted to sleep like this..."_  I looked at the time on my phone then quickly got dressed. "Jacob, get up. You'll be late." I walked towards the bed then started shaking him. "You can stop...I'm up." I tossed him some clothes that he left in case he stayed over then hurried about. "What time is it...?" "2:12pm. Now get your things and let's go." I pushed him out the door then locked my door before heading downstairs.

I pulled over by the building then watched Jacob get out. "Sorry about last night." "It's okay, don't worry about it." I wanted to puke. He waved as I pulled off. Last night was a strange experience and I hoped it would never happen again. I had luckily found a parking spot near my job and parked. I hurried inside and briefly greeted the others.

"You're usually here earlier than us. What happened? Overslept?" "Kinda." I fixed my hair in the mirror then smiled in satisfaction. "Did you get laid last night?" I widened my eyes in shock then quickly shook my head. "I mean, you look better than usual. So if you didn't fuck, you masturbated instead?" "Leave me alone, Hyunjae." I walked back to the front and busied myself. "Fine. I'll stop, but, guess what Juyeon told me." "It better not be about porn." "Not this time. Lord, can he talk. Anyway, Jaemi is supposed to be coming by today." He showed me a picture and like he said, she was tiny and cute. "He's a lucky guy." "I agree." "Aren't you dating someone too?" "Yeah..." I sighed then went to go take someone's order.

"Dude, it's Jaemi." I looked and saw a short woman take a seat at one of the tables. I went over to take her order and was surprised by her way of speaking. "Do ya havea meat substitute or nah?" "We do." "Then lemme get that and uh, a Coke." "The seafood platter, but chicken instead of crab and a Coke?" "Yeah." I bowed then quickly headed to the back. "So? Did she talk cutely?" "Hardly." I looked back at her and wondered if it was just her dialect. "Juyeon isn't coming in today?" "He is. He was switched last minute to the night shift." "I've never been switched to another shift." "Be glad. It's hell." I looked at Hyunjae for answers but he simply left to go take an order.

I placed her order in front of her and saw the hungry look in her eyes. "Thank ya kindly, Changmin." "You're welcome." No matter how much I heard her speak, it never matched how she dressed. She stuck around for a bit before paying and taking her leave. "I need to meet people..." "Then why don't you do it?" "I don't have time. I work two jobs, you know." "Right." I never took Hyunjae to be a hard worker, but he had proven me wrong. "So, I never did ask. How was the date?" I dropped the fork in my hand then scrambled to pick it up. "I'll stop while I'm ahead." He handed me a new fork then sent me on my way.

Just as my shift had ended, a familiar face had walked in with another in tow. "Eric!" "Hey." I gave him a hug then looked him up and down. "Your suit, it looks amazing. Did you get a raise?" "Actually..." He whispered the details in my ear and I couldn't hide my surprise. "Congratulations! Is this why you can't come see me like I want you to?" "Exactly." "Oh, hey Sangyeon. Didn't see you there." "Sup." "Oh, I just got off my shift, do you want to go somewhere?" Eric brought me over to their table and sat me down. "We're good. So, update me on everything."

"And now I'm coughing flower petals. Daisies to be exact." "Well, maybe it's time. You both have been dating for 2 years going on 3 two months from now." I hit his arm as I couldn't believe he'd say something like that. I looked to Sangyeon, but he looked away and down at the menu. "It's not that bad you two!" "When was the last time you kissed? Cuddled? Did something  **actual**  couples do?" I thought about everything he had mentioned and unfortunately, I couldn't remember a thing. I sighed heavily as Eric made tsking sounds. "Changmin, just take my advice.  **Break up**."


	7. 7 - 1

**~Time skip: 2 weeks~**

Not much had changed between Jacob and I, but he seems to be hanging around that coworker a lot. I should stop keeping my anger pent up inside and just tell him. But what if it completely turns him away? I decided to see what he was doing after work so we could talk about our relationship in person. "I can make it tonight. I'll call you." "Please do. And don't agree to do anything after work." "Yeah, yeah." He hung up and I felt frustrated. I coughed hard then groaned as daisies had fallen into my food.

ㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐ

The episode was reaching its climax when my phone started ringing. I reluctantly paused it and answered. "Let me guess, they offered you a good pay and you couldn't possibly pass it up." He was silent on the other side which confirmed my suspicions. "I'm han-" "I'm outside your door." I got up and walked over to see if he really was. He was. I felt somewhat idiotic for what I said before. I hung up then opened the door to let him in.

We sat in silence as I sipped on my cup of water, avoiding eye contact. "What am I to you?" "What kind of question is that? You're my boyfriend?"  _"Yet you treat me like the plague."_  "You don't really seem to believe that." I bit my bottom lip as I listened to his response. "I'm sorry if I haven't been there for you. My job is keeping me busy these days."  _"But you get a choice!"_  "But before..." He sighed then made me look at him. "I am not cheating on you, so stop thinking that if you are. Everything is going to be okay." I wanted to yell that nothing was okay. That me being tossed aside was hurtful and watching other people cling to him stung. Why couldn't I voice my real feelings? Was I really okay with this?

"I'll get going. We have an early shoot tomorrow." "Wait." He sat back down and peered curiously into my face. "Can you stay? I want to cuddle..." It hurt to see that he looked conflicted and hesitant. "Sure, but do you really want to get up early?" "I'll do anything for you, you know this." He held me close and I felt all my worries disappear as if they never existed. This was what I've been missing. The days of when we were smitten for each other. I felt Jacob plant kisses on my forehead then peer into my face. "You don't look well..." It pained me to hear that he's only now noticing.

I haven't been well since I first coughed up petals. I figured it was a side effect that came with it as Ms. Kori looked the same as well. He gently pressed his lips against mine which caught me by surprise. I returned the gesture and felt that everything he had previously done were just small mishaps. There was no way this man before me could slowly be losing his love for me if he's currently kissing me. We broke apart and sat in complete silence as we enjoyed each other's company.


	8. 6 - 1

I woke up and saw that I was alone in bed.  _"He left..."_  I sighed and figured that he would've, considering that he brought it up last night. I coughed harshly and watched as a handful of petals were now strewn about. I still refused to believe it, believe that Jacob doesn't love me anymore. I know that love isn't forever as I've dated others before him, but there was something about Jacob that said he's the one. He said he felt the same way and it was obvious he meant it. What could possibly be making him lose interest in us? In me?

ㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐ

I found myself making mistakes as I worked today, and was scolded every time by my superior. I quietly stood by the wall then saw a coworker sidle over to me. "This isn't like you. What's going on?" "Nothing." "We know how you work, and this isn't it." "Drop it, Danwoong." "Just be careful, okay? We care about you." I heard them walk away then hurried to one of my tables. As I cleared the table, I dropped one of the knives and kneeled to pick it up, only to drop everything as I felt nothing but pain in my arm. "Oh my...Are you okay?" I managed to weakly spit out an "I'm okay." as I hurriedly picked up the fallen dishes.

I inspected my arm where the knife had sliced my skin and was disgusted by the sight. I heard someone come in as I was placing band aids on my cut. "Mr. Ji." I knew that voice and it was one I didn't expect to hear again so soon. "Manager Choi." I already knew what was coming as I heard from Hyunjae about other employees who were fired. You get a lengthy lecture then you're handed your pay for the next payday and told to never come back here to work. "Changmin, I'm sending you home." "P-Pardon?" He patted my shoulder then left. I had expected to be fired on the spot, but I was being sent home instead.

I sat cross legged on the couch and stared blankly at the wall. From the stories I heard, Mr. Choi didn't seem at all friendly, but today proved that wrong. I coughed and found myself getting used to seeing petals scattered around. I thought back to what Eric said and wondered if breaking up was the right choice. Was our relationship beyond saving? I shook my head then called Jacob. He didn't answer, so I left a voicemail and waited. I wanted to see him, to hug him. I lied down and closed my eyes, eventually falling asleep.

ㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐ

I woke up and saw it was close to becoming dark. I checked my phone and saw I had quite a few messages from Juyeon, Hyunjae and others. It made me happy to see that they cared about my wellbeing, even if it wasn't serious. "Why can't Jacob be like that..." I replied to them all and felt myself tearing up after seeing that Jacob hadn't contacted me back. I continued to cling to this hope, this ray of light that Jacob was still the Jacob I fell for and started dating. It felt stupid and pathetic.  **I**  felt stupid and pathetic.

My phone lit up and I picked it up while wiping my eyes. I opened the message from Jacob then nearly threw my phone across the room in rage. I opted for throwing it at the couch and proceeded to cry again. Is he even aware of how his actions are affecting me? Maybe this is what he wants. I started thinking that seeing me like this made him happy. Seeing me suffer made him happy, no matter how sick it sounded. I wanted nothing but for Jacob to be happy, so I decided to go along with it.


	9. 5 - 1

**~Time skip: 3 weeks~**

Our anniversary crept closer and I wanted to at least celebrate that day with him. I erased the thought from my mind as I didn't want to experience a bigger letdown than I already expected. I managed to get a raise despite the poor performance I showed weeks ago. I gently placed their orders in front of them and slightly bowed before walking away. "I hear your anniver-" I clamped my hand over Juyeon's mouth then pinched him discreetly. "Ow...Sorry. I thought you'd be more excited." I didn't give him an answer as I hurried over to one of my tables.

I gathered my things from my locker then looked at the photo I had hung in there. It was a photo of Jacob and I at the beach and I was finishing the heart he had only half drawn. I took it out and stuffed it in my pocket before closing my locker. As I reached for the front door, I felt someone stop me. "You can talk to us, Chang...Don't forget that." Juyeon let me go and gave me a smile. I felt thankful then for having someone like Juyeon around.

I stopped by Jacob's company to talk to the security guard. "Are you here for Jacob?" "Nope. I'm here to talk to you." She chuckled then let me take a seat next to her. "What's up? The last time we talked like this was the day you planned to confess." I pushed that memory aside and talked to her about anything other than Jacob. "Chang honey, I've got something to tell you. Jacob isn't looking too good these days. He comes in looking a mess and sometimes reeks of alcohol or cigarettes. Or both." I looked at her in shock and I assume that told her all she needed to know.

"There's something going on between you two isn't there?" I could never get a lie past her, so I decided to spill the entire truth. She listened intently and that one thing made me feel like I mattered. "Well then that would explain why. He's feeling free. Maybe you can use the anniversary to sway his heart back." "You think so?" "Definitely. I'll help this time as well." I couldn't have been more thankful to have her as a friend. "Oh, you know that picture he always had in that frame? He threw them both out. He wasted such a pretty frame."

I felt something inside me break. We had brought that frame together. And that the photo was of us having a picnic in the park. He snapped a photo of me while I was eating and my cheeks were full. "Hon, are you okay?" I snapped my head in her direction and saw nothing but worry. "I'm fine." My voice came out hoarse and choked. She hugged me and patted my back. I didn't want to cry in front of her, but my tears spilled out anyway. "Was it important to both of you?" I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. I quickly ran out of the building and got in my car. After calming down a bit, I put my car in drive and drove away.

As I parked, my phone lit up and started ringing. I turned off the engine and grabbed my phone, not bothering to answer it. I locked my door then heard movement coming from inside.  _"A robber...?"_  I grabbed the bat I had hidden in the hall closet and hid it behind me. I peeked into the living room but didn't see anyone. I heard movement from my bedroom and prepared myself to fight. I cracked open the door and saw a figure looking through my drawers.  _"Now's my chance."_  I quietly slipped in and got ready to swing until I saw it was Jacob. I cleared my throat and watched him jump in fright.


	10. 4 - 1

"I demand answers." "I was looking for that photo Jimin took of us at the fountain." "You could've asked me. Why did you  **really**  sneak in?" He sighed then showed me a book that was hidden behind his back. "My book..." It was his book of songs. Why was he taking it? We haven't even sang all of them together like we planned to. "Why..." He didn't answer me and I subconsciously gripped the bat tighter. "I asked why, Jacob." He looked away and I found myself throwing the bat at the wall above my bed. I slumped down onto the floor and broke down in tears. "I didn't think they meant anything to you anymore..." I flinched at his touch then tried squirming away from his hold.

"Changmin...quiet down..." His voice which used to soothe me sounded like death's calling in my ears. I had lost it that night. Everything that I had been bottling up had come spilling out and there was no stopping it. "Why are you doing this to me? Do you love me or not? I'm tired of all these excuses to not see me then act all sweet when I come around as if nothing happened. Why won't you just tell me how you're feeling? Why..." I cried more as finally voicing my feelings probably had a big consequence and could ruin whatever was left.

He was silent and I decided to keep going. "I don't know what to do anymore. You just suddenly stopped caring and it's made me like this. My work is suffering, my coworkers are more worried about me than you. I want you back Jacob. I thought suffering like this made you happy, but it's only making me worse. If you don't want to date anymore, just say so. Don't drag it out...Please..." I wiped my face then looked up at Jacob. I couldn't tell if he was sad or didn't give a fuck at all. "Changmin..." I knew what was going to come next, but it still hurt. I prepared myself to hear the words, those heart wrenching words.

"Can you free your schedule for our anniversary?" I looked at him in shock as that wasn't what I was expecting. "I know I haven't been the best boyfriend, and I apologize for that. After hearing your true feelings, it made me think as well. The truth is that I really am falling out of love with you. I didn't like it, but it continued to grow. I didn't know what to do, so I gave up. I still care about you, and I always will. I want to love you again and this anniversary trip can play a part in the deciding factor." I cupped his face then planted kisses on his cheeks. "Even if we do break up, just know that I'll still love you. I can't imagine being with anyone other than you." He leaned into my hand and hummed in response.

ㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐ

I woke up and found myself staring nothing but white. I sat up and realized it was only my pillow.  _"He left again...It's not surprising..."_  I heard the door open and saw Jacob walking in with a glass of water. "Thank you." He sat down next to me then pulled me onto his lap. I placed the half empty glass on the nightstand then felt kisses being planted on my neck. "Not now..." Despite me saying that, my body wanted more. I felt Jacob's cock as I attempted to move and it was clear that he wanted it to. I broke free of Jacob's hold then pinned him down onto the bed. "I want you, Changmin."

As much as I wanted to, I felt I was being used to relieve him. I let him go then left the room. I hid in the bathroom and refused to come out when he called out my name. I felt thankful for having enough respect for myself to not go through with it. I knew it wasn't Jacob's intent, but after last night, it made it appear that way. Most of our day was spent on opposite sides of the bathroom door.


	11. 3 - 1

**~Time skip: 2 weeks~**

I sighed while I cleared yet another table of dirty dishes and glasses. I wondered how things were with Eric and the company. Is he doing well leading everyone? I thought back to the night that I had broken down and spilled my hidden feelings. He had taken it in a surprisingly calm manner as if he was waiting or something. I knocked over a glass and felt relieved that it was empty, but it had knocked over the sugar dispenser. "Fuck..." I sighed as I swept the fallen sugar into the bin as well.

I was having a conversation with Juyeon about choosing gifts when he repeatedly tapped my shoulder. "What?" "Look." He pointed towards the entrance and there was Jacob with who I assume were coworkers. Most of them were females and there was only one other male besides him. "Jacob sure is popular..." "I'm aware..." I found out that some of his coworkers were attracted to him because of his angelic like and sweet nature. I couldn't really blame them as I was one of his victims too.

As luck would have it, I was forced to be the server of his table as the others purposefully took on other tables. "Hello, my name is Changmin and I'll be your server today. I'll come back later to see if you're ready to order your meal. Does anyone know what they want to drink now or no?" A few ordered drinks and I was relieved to have finally gotten away. "You looked pretty composed out there." "I was doing my job." I watched as they all talked and I noticed two of the women would look in my direction then look away.  _"Are they talking about me? Positively or negatively...?"_

I carried their orders over then placed the tray on top of the tray stand. "Thank you for waiting." I passed the dishes to the two closest to me which happened to be Jacob and that woman I saw over a month ago in his room. As I handed her a dish, I felt something hit my arm causing me to drop the dish all over her and the person next to her. "Hey!" I apologized and quickly moved to get the mess cleaned up.

As I came back, I spotted Manager Choi standing by their table. I sighed heavily as I knew it was definitely coming out of my paycheck. I timidly walked over and began to clean while listening to the conversation. "This is what happens when you hire inane employees..." She scoffed then looked in my direction. I could feel her glaring at me and I felt uncomfortable. "Did anyone else see what happened?" Most of the group agreed with her story, except Jacob. He was the only that hadn't spoken up. "And you sir?"

"I saw it. It's true that he dropped the food all over her, but it wasn't his fault." Everyone looked at Jacob including me. I knew something was off when I reached over. "W-What do you mean?" "You moved his arm. It's that simple." Everyone had started murmuring and it amused me to see her crumbling. "Miss, we don't tolerate this kind of behavior here, so please tell us what happened or else we'll charge you and send you on your way without food." I knew it was only a threat, but it also didn't seem like one either. "Fine. I moved his arm. He was telling the truth." I walked away to dispose of the now dirty food and rags.

I closed my locker then jumped when someone tapped my shoulder. "What happened over there?" "Don't worry about it." I patted Hyunjae's shoulder then headed for the front door. It was heartwarming seeing Jacob stick up for me when he didn't have to. I unlocked my car and got in, tossing my bag into the passenger seat. I heard a tapping on the window and saw Jacob waving at me. I rolled the window down and received a face full of flower. "I got these as an apology for earlier. I'll come here alone next time." He motioned for me to come closer then kissed my forehead when I did. "I'll see you." I watched as he got into someone's car and they drove away. I smiled then coughed. _"More daisies..."_


	12. 2 - 1

**~Time skip: 1 week~**

Somehow, the universe worked in my favor as Manager Choi told me that I didn't have to come in today. I was told the day before as I was leaving. I zipped up my bag and made sure I had everything before I left.

I waited outside in my car for Jacob to come downstairs. I drummed my fingers against the wheel as I didn't think he'd take this long to get ready. After an hour passed, I headed upstairs to see what the hold up was. I opened the door to his apartment and looked around. I checked the bathroom first and saw nothing. I checked the bedroom next and didn't see him nor anything there.

I dialed his number and was surprised that it went straight to voicemail. "Is his phone dead...?" I shook my head as Jacob was never one to have a dead phone. I decided to check at the company and see if he ditched me once again.

"Hey, what's the rush?" "Is Jacob here today?" "Nope. I remember him coming back after everyone else and telling me about his plans a week from then." "Did he go home alone?" She shook her head then explained what happened. "So, they left together and that was when I last saw him." I was about to ask for the address when my ringtone rang aloud. "Chang, where are you?" "At the company, why?" "...far...Okay, come meet back at your place. Hurry." He hung up and I wasted no time in getting back to my car. "I'll call if he comes in!" I gave her a thumbs up then drove back home.

I pulled over and saw Jacob looking around. I waved him down and he quickly got in. "I'm so glad to see you." He held my hands then kissed my knuckles. "Alright, let's get going." I looked and immediately knew the route to get there. I pulled off then decided to ask. "Where did you go last night?" "Misung's. She wanted to talk business. I shamelessly fell asleep as we talked. I woke up and saw that I was alone in a bedroom, so I decided to explore. Point is, I caught her slipping some sleeping drug into my drink so I ran."

Music played as we sat in silence. I noticed the music had been turned really low and a sweet melody started playing. I knew this melody. I quietly sang along with Jacob as we neared our destination. I parked into a free spot then turned off the engine. The sound of laughter, music and seagulls filled my ears. It brought back memories. We got out and I grabbed the blanket and umbrella from the back. "Shall we?" He held out his hand to me and I took it.

We sat on the blanket as we listened to his songs and watched children run around. "Jacob." "Hm?" "Remember when I first suggested this place? You were so excited to go that you couldn't sleep." "I still feel bad for calling you in the dead of night." "It was cute though. How you couldn't sleep so you decided to sing me to sleep. Ironically, you were the one to fall asleep." We both chuckled at the memory then felt Jacob starting to shift. We changed to another position which consisted of us lying down next to each other.

We reminisced a bit more before I decided to head into the water. He stayed behind claiming that someone had to watch our things. I dropped the shell in my hand and managed to find it in the water. I stood up then immediately blacked out. It hurt.


	13. 0

I was only greeted with silence then a muffled voice which slowly became louder. I recognized the voice as Jacob's and tried to sit up, only to be forced back down. I opened my eyes fully and saw Jacob and a few others looking at me with concern. "You're awake..." I could see the relief on his face and it warmed my heart. "What happened...?" The few other apologized as they had hit me by accident. I forgave them then watched as relief filled their faces as well. They walked away leaving us alone once more.

"I was worried when you suddenly collapsed. I only looked away for a moment..." "I'm fine." He ran his fingers through my hair then kissed my forehead. "It's okay, Chang. You can tell me anything." I wasn't lying this time. Sure, there was still a bit of throbbing, but other than that I was okay. I suddenly remembered the shell and saw Jacob was holding it. "Oh, looking for this? It's really pretty." "Well, it was for you." "Oh." He put it in his pocket then thanked me. I noticed the sky had started turning orange, signaling that the sun was starting to set. "Let's hang around here."

ㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐㅐ

Night had covered the beach and only a few people hung around. I coughed off to the side then quickly hid the petals in the sand. "You okay?" "Fine." It's not that Jacob didn't know about it. Everyone knows about coughing petals for unrequited love. I just didn't want him making a fuss over it. "I don't know what to say. It's not the same." Here it was, the scene that I've been expecting since we both spoke our hearts. "I don't know how I feel about you anymore. Seeing you getting picked on then enraged me and earlier when you collapsed worried me to the core, but when it's us around people together, it feels like a normal friendship. Maybe I only see you as a close friend..."

I had no response. He basically broke up with me indirectly. I bit down hard on my bottom lip. Even though I knew it would come down to this, it still hurt. It's like knowing your grandparent will eventually pass, but still hurting when they do. No matter how prepared you are, it will still hurt. I stood up and jogged over to the water. There was hardly any light around, so it was pretty dark around us. I took steps forward then coughed. "Changmin? Come back over here, I'm sure the water is cold." It was cold and sent a few shivers up my body.

I walked further in then stopped when it reached my waist. I was moved side to side by the waves then knocked over by a bigger one. I stood up then felt arms wrap around my waist. "Stop. This is dangerous." "Maybe I want to experience some danger." I pried his hands off of me then walked sideways, steadying myself as the waves pushed me. I looked back and saw Jacob following me. I decided to step out as I didn't want Jacob to encounter any trouble.

"Let's go." "You didn't let me finish." "Right, we didn't officially break up." I closed the umbrella then started rolling up the blanket. "What I said was true, but seeing you walk further into the water made me realize that I couldn't imagine life without you." "I get it. I'm an irreplaceable friend." I walked back to the car then put the items in the trunk. I waited for him to head over, but he never did. I sighed then went back to see what was keeping him.

I saw him sitting in the sand close to falling asleep. I shook him then noticed the strange line in the sand. "Complete it if you're willing to give me another chance." I looked and saw the shell sitting next to him covered in sand. I looked at Jacob then back towards the car. I had made my decision, and I was confident that things would be better this way. I knew future me would be thanking me.

"This my choice, Jacob."


End file.
